Friday, May 30, 2008

Home Sweet....?

If you know me well enuff to have evah planned anythang w. me, you mite know that ah am DEATHLY afraid of countin my chickens before they hatch. Ah think this stems back to my early childhood, when ah would often git sooo excited about thangs before they happened that it was sometimes hard fer me to enjoy tha actual act. If you don't know me that well, you mite at least know that ahve spent a fair amount of work counteracting some of my natural inclinations in ordah ta be, well, more sane.

So ahm sorta out on a limb here, but tha reason fer tha fingah crossin should be fairly obvious - it looks very much like ah have a new place ta live in tha city! Ah wasn't 100% sure thangs were gawna werk out, as ah hadn't met most of tha folks livin thar, n it was kinda last minute - n ah was especially afraid b/c ah turned down a slightly nicer place ta live b.c ahd already told these folks ahd be tha new roomie (A choice ah may nawt necessarily live ta regret, but ah will prolly always wondah what life would've been like thar - likely a bit more comfortable). But today ah wrote a check fer 1st n last months rent fer a bedroom in a 4 bed/1.5 bath flat on tha outskirts of tha mission district - located above a church. It has a MASSIVE backyard that is TOTALLY overrun w. weeds but w. great potential - if ah had three solid weeks ta dae nuthang but dig it up. Washer dryer onsite (bonus), a room outlooking mission street (nawt so much of a bonus - thassa loud n busy street), but they are a bit desperate ah think n thus willin ta live w. my bass playin n singin. It has a lil bit of charm - in a strange way, n really tha worse thang about it (so far) is that it has an electric stove.

So tomorrow ahm gittin a van n gaein intae berkeley n then oakland ta buy a dresser n a bed (both wicked cheap) n then movin those intae tha place, n sunday will be about movin all tha bits n pieces. Ahll prolly sleep here on Sunday nite so ah ken return tha van n then gae ta werk - n then ah will gae home ta tha mission on Monday afternoon. So surreal - n soooo much ta dae before then.

Ah should really be in full force right now, but honestly, ahm way more likely ta just fawk around so tomorrow n sunday ken be tha main effort. Nice enuff, ahm home alone this weekend so ah ken spread out a bit as needed.

Ahm still nervous n a bit unsettled but excited that ahm takin tha next step towards livin tha kinda life ah want. 7 freakin months in el cerrito - ah really nevah expected that. All in all tho, its nawt been too bad - but its time fer a change.

special thanks to all those out thar who've kept my plight in yer thoughts - ah know my housin situation is far from bein tha most important n pressin mattah in most peoples lives, so ah appreciate any amount of good intentions folks have sent my way.

Next stop - San Fran-fawkin-cisco baby!

"I don't actually have a pen"

Warren Teagarden played to nobody last nite (again) at the fabulous Stork Club in Oakland. We hit tha stage around 11 and played too fast and since no one showed up ah decided ahd reacquaint myself w. an old friend - $2 PBRs. We gawt pretty chummy by tha end of tha nite....

Durin one of tha otha acts, ah went to tha bar n briefly chatted up this girl whod ordered a jagerbomb - mostly out of boredom and it was a little away from tha musick. She was nice, but thar wasn't any chemistry er attraction - at least on my end. She was pretty touchy pretty quickly, fairly drunk, n w/ a friend who was kinda anti-social. They also stated they were on thar way out soon, nae mattah my band was up ta rawk in about 15 mins. As they were leavin she hugged me, n told me ah should call her, remindin herself ah didn't have her numbah mid-sentance. She told me ah could have it if ah wanted, so ah sorta shrugged noncommittally n put my hands in my pocket. Now, if she'd asked me fer mine, ah would've definitely given it ta her, but ah didn't feel like gaein through tha motions of takin her numbah while her friend waited fer her outside b/c ah knew ah wouldn't call her so. So instead ah told her "Ah don't actually have a pen." Ahm just smooth like that.

As much fun as ah had w. my old buddy tho, he's left me w. a bit of a headache this mornin, just like tha jerk he is.

N don't stop crossin yer fingahs until ah update tonite please!!

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

in case yer readin...




...think good thoughts fer me please!

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Just something I noticed....

When ah first moved here, ah jammed w. these two guys (literally 3 days aftah ah landed). They were a guitarist and drummer who were set on "doing this for a living." Their craigslist add boasted that they knew how to write killer licks and needed someone who would be able to tour that summer. They were also looking for a vocalist.

Ah was pretty under-impressed w. tha musick we actually jammed on - nawt that it was bad, but it was fairly derivative, and tha songs were more like riffs stuck together then anything w. real vision or purpose. Some dude named Ash came by and played very 80s guitar and sang very 80s vocals on top of it - he was obviously really psyched about tha possibility of playin. Ah told them ahd be up fer playin again, if they were interested (cuz thas whas nice ta say). They nevah called me back, n ah believe found a vocalist briefly.

Tha biggest thang is thar drummer just did NAWT have tha chops it took ta play what they were gaein fer - fair enuff, he'd only recently switched from bass. But it was pretty much impossible to "groove" with him, as their ad stated they were looking for. Shortly thereafter I found both Warren Teagarden and think13 and ahve been busy evah since. Every once in a while, ahd find thar ad on craigslist (it nevah hurts ta see whats out thar) n kinda felt sorry fer them, but nawt too much b.c of how full of themselves they came across in tha ad.

Yestahday, ah was lookin around, n found a similar post - only this time it was only tha guitarist lookin. that band that was gawna take everythang disbanded some time ago - leavin some poorly produced tracks on myspace as tha only testament to thar fame. Ah was a lil dissapointed they nevah called me again - just b/c ah like hearin what a kickass bassist ah was. But sometimes its nice ta have proof that thangs werk out fer a reason. Ah wondah if that drummer evah realized he had about 2 years of solid practicin ta dae ta git close to tha person he wanted ta be......

Monday, May 26, 2008

MEM Day

Memorial Day 2008 will always be remembered by me as my first paid holiday. Dog Bless America.

Tomorrow is my last chance ta move on June 1st. Honestly, ahd almost ratha wait it out n hope somethang else comes along before June 20th - but will jump on any of tha three places ah see tomorrow if ah think thars enuff room ta be me thar n they want me.

Then tha rest of tha week is stupid busy - this Sunday will be tha last day ah clean tha yoga studio fer free yoga ah think. Ah changes - mostly endings, nawt many beginnins in site as of yet....but thars time still.

Ah did nawt dae any of tha stuff ah was supposed ta dae today, minus a lil housekeepin. Ah did howevah record a bunch of backing tracks of old n new Severe Bass songs on tha PA downstairs. Tha recordin quality is far from superb, but its embarassingly bettah then anythang else ah have as of now. Specifically that tha bass n vocals will finally be on separate tracks. Ahm still lackin tha equipment ta effectively multi-track in real time (Cuz ah suck), but have bit tha bullet n decided ta put down separate bass n vocal tracks so ah have a bit more flexibility with tha performances/editin/effects/etc. But ah'll finally have some more listenable tracks - at least fer potential producers. Ahve pretty much decided ta record a demo in a semi-real studio w. a semi-pro producer sometime in tha next year er so - w. a band of some sort.

Why? Honestly - cuz ahm nawt gittin any bettah at singin. Ah have my moments, n still love it, but ah dont have tha focus, tha patience, er really tha natural ability ta be a solo act - n gae anywhar with it. Ahll prolly always write solo pieces, n hopefully be able ta perform that way ferevah, but ahm startin ta just face facts that Severe Bass in its ESSENCE is just nawt tha listenable. N bands just rawk harder - way more fun fer me!

Ah think it marks some sort of a transition - n lets face it, bands rawk hardah. Speakin of bands, n ah dont want ta git my hopes up, but ah talked to a drummer who wants to put a jawbreaker cover band togetha n ah cant wait ta find out if he ken make it happen w. my help!

Saturday, May 24, 2008

Hunting Houses in SF - tha most difficult sport EVAH!

Yeah, ah still don't have a place ta live. W/ tha combination of people nawt gittin back ta me, missin a window, n tha ridiculously high competition fer a decent crash pad, ahm still in el Cerrito - fer who knows how long.

One of these days all that good karma ahm tryin ta generate n all tha bad karma from tha fuckheads who don't git back to me will figure shite out n ahll be granted a sweet place ta call home. Until then - big balls of stress! N evaluatin my self-worth, watchin what ah say, n driftin close to depression (at least today).

Most recently frustrating is ah saw a great place n had a good vibe w. tha folx - but an off-handed comment about tha obnoxiousness of tha cat ah live w. has led them ta think ahm nawt animal-friendly n would let one of thar critters starve. From now on, ah keep my big mouth shut about how much tha resident cat gits on my (n everyone else's nerves).

So - thars really only one fix when ah feel like ahm daein all ah possibly ken ta make this shite werk out n tha universe continues ta turn me down - take some of my favorite medication n beat tha crap out of my 4-string. good thang she likes it rough.

Oh, n ahve gawt a bunch of shows comin up which is really sweet - but ah think ahd prefer a place ta live and a summah devoid of opportunities ta rawk on stage.

So to those of you w/ a place ta call home - it might nawt always seem like much, but don't EVAH take it fer granted. Ah nevah will again.

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

What daes it take to find a good Hand Percussionist?

An earlier blog chronicled the firing of think13's previous hand drummer - a great guy w. a problem w. sticking up to women who wanted to take advantage of him. Since he left, thar's been a hole in our sound - one prolly only noticeable to me n tha rest of think13. Ah've taken it upon myself ta aggressively look fer a new one b/c, well, thas how ah am. Especially when ah want somethang done. It's nawt been gaein well.

Initially, ah had several misses on replies - folks who didn't have their schedule under hand, or didn't get back to me about ANYTHING (including their name - man it weirds me out when someone's email has a name attached to it - that is nuthang like tha name they sign it with), etc. Finally thar was a potential fit who was less then responsive, n cancelled tha day of b/c of strep throat. She seemed a bit spacey, but hey, we're looking for musicians (n psuedo-drummahs at that) so ah let it fly. We re-schedule fer next week - she even calls to confirm it tha day before - n nevah shows up. Nae call, nae email, nuthang. boo. Unfortunetly, ah wasn't even that surprised.

Next add, ah git anutha email from a very interested n recent transplant to tha area - calls me right back, chats me up fer a while, sounds like it could werk out. Ah send him an email latah w. a tune - hear nuthang (back - nawt necessarily a problem). Call tha guy on Sunday ta confirm, n he tells me tha mp3 didn't gae through, but he heard some of tha otha stuff - will see him on Sunday. Guess what happened?

Dee's convinced thars lurkers on craigslist that dae this just fer kicks - n ah can't say ah disagree necessarily. Ah didn't really expect findin a new drum-guy would be tha EASIEST thang in tha world, but ah was definitely more concerned about havin ta listen ta gawdawful drummin then ah was some person flakin. It's sorta amazing how awesome n awful craigslist ken be dependin on tha day, huh?

Monday, May 19, 2008

A lil ado about Severe

Ahd like ta first note that this is my 101st blog entry - altho that numbah does include tha 11-er-so entries made a couple years back in a slang that is most definitely nawt Severe - strange as it may have been.

Do I have a place to live yet? no. Do I feel better about those odds? Maybe. Ask me on Friday.

I still don't know how much tha ticket will cost - bargh.

Howevah, ah had a good weekend.

My lil bro graduated himself from college on Saturday w. a schmance degree in Electrical Engineering. Guess which of us is makin more money?

So ah flew intae tha East Coast on Virgin Airlines fer a ridiculously low fair like 130 each way fer a direct flight. Note to all you folx who should visit when ah have a place ta live - Virgin Airlines rawks! In flight tv, musick, games, chat w. people in otha seats, yep, its pretty good.

Ah apologize to you DC Metro folx who may just be learnin now that ah was in town. Suffice ta say, ah was nawt around fer long, n knew ah wouldn't have much hang out time, n gave my best friend from jr. high dibs on my company. Please don't feel like ah dont love and miss you - ah just didn't need to try and squeeze in more then that. Ah'll catch you next time, ah promise.

Tha majority of tha time was of kerse spent in Richmond eating food and sitting through ceremonies, altho Saturday night had a particularly kickass turn out of folks to remind me why ah love richmond and tha people who inhabit it. And sleeping, b/c:

My trip out, while quick, was a bit heavy. Work on Thursday until 6, n then straight to SFO via BART. Overnite flite ta Dulles, a nap, a drive ta richmond, n then a graduation ceremony/dinnah. Sleep and then up fer ANUTHA graduation ceremony, more food, n eventually tha aforementioned nite drinking on a porch. Tha next mornin - more food, wandering, n drivin back to DC. Ah woke up this mornin at 5:20 am Eastern (thas 2:20 am Pacific), took at 7 am flight home, and then went to werk fer 5 hours - surprisingly busy and productive. Actually, if my work load was that big all tha time, ah could justify a raise pretty quickly...

N now ahm back, tired, playin my bass, n sendin out more emails about how great of a roommate ah am. Thars some gigs that have popped up fer tha next couple weeks - includin a likely confliction between think13 n mr. teagarden. How dae ah decide? - Diplomatically. First come, first served is tha way mr. Severe werks in that department - at least in theory. We shall see....

Thursday, May 08, 2008

WTF???

Ah was runnin a few minutes late today - n tha way ah dae thangs is a few minutes ken make all tha difference. Ah have a pretty tight routine down in tha mornin that doesn't allow fer much more then 7 minutes between leavin my house n bein upstairs at tha BART stop fer my train. If ah miss that one, anutha train comes in 8 minutes - but requires a transfer. Tha next direct train isn't fer 15 minutes, which is pretty anticlimactic aftah a fast n furious bike ride.

Generally ah pay relatively good attention to traffic signs, etc. But when ahm late, n approachin a cross street w. nawt a car in sight, ahll usually gae right past it. Today, this led to me gittin stopped by a cop, who wrote me a ticket fer failin ta yield to a stop sign. Ah was hopin by playin tha complacent offendee, ah mite git off w. a warnin (hey, it werked when ah bought underage youth alcohol!), but nae such luck.

Aftahwerds, ah wish ahd been at least a touch more rebellious - nawt ta fight tha ticket, but when he mentioned that if a car had broken tha law ah just ignored, it would be big trouble ah wish ahd pointed out that ahm nawt a two ton vehicle in motion powered by dinosaur debris - ahma dude on a bike n combined we don't total 175 pounds (ahm skinny, ah know). Also, ah really should've mentioned that while ah wasn't arguin that ahd broken tha law, as someone who gawt mugged by uncaught (n apparently somewhat notoroius) thugs just three blocks away, ah didn't support spendin so much person-power on finin cyclists who breezed through a stop sign. Especially when he told me thar were cops all along tha path today. Ah hate bein caught off guard!

Tha biggest kickah is ah totally read an article in tha SF Weekly just tha aftahnoon before that mentioned how cops were crackin down on cyclists - n nawt those who drive automobiles b/c "studies" have started indicatin that cylcists are more likely ta disobey tha traffic rules then cars are. Tha slant was that more education/awareness could potentially fix tha amount of accidents n help folx share tha road bettah (as an initiative in Marin is startin ta prove), but ah really should've taken somethang more then that away from it. Considerin tha amount of stop signs ah have nae problem runnin so long as thars nae one drivin on tha road, ah ken almost assume tha cops read tha same fricken article ah did ta git tha idea.

When asked how much it mite run me (why dae ah dae this? Cops nevah know - er if they don't they don't say what tha consequences are EVAH), ah was told that tha verdict was usually about half what a car violation was. While ah git this in concept, if we want ta gae by weight/impact/etc., a 1 to 10 ratio is a lawt more accurate. Thus far findin what this translates to in American dollars has proved fruitless.

Worst part - this could (probably will) give me points on my license, which ah really hope doesn't increase my non-car-ownin insurance. How stupid is all this?

Monday, May 05, 2008

"Teeth" Review

Every Rose Has It's Thorn

Ahll admit, half of tha appeal of this movie is its ridiculous idea coupled w. a Poison song title as tha tagline(one that I cover). And the trailer totally won me over - purposely awkward, a touch gorey, and really they are makin a real movie about a toothy vagina? Fer serious?

So ah couldn't find anyone ta see it with when it was in local theatres (cuz tha Bay area gits EVERY FRICKEN MOVIE EVAH!), but ah did recently snag a copy now that its hit DVDs.

"Teeth" delivers pretty much everythang you could n should expect from a current independant but classy horror movie about a penis-chomping vagina. Tha film itself totally knows whar everythang is gaein, but tha particpants are only vaguely clued in. Tha acting is quite good (Jess Weixler won Sundance for her performance), the script is mostly good (plenty of bad moments, n a poorly developed brother-in-law give it the right amount of cheese), and it's a great example of "show, don't tell" (without ever giving us a real view of whatevah tha hell it is w. tha aforementioned teeth - specifically that the dialogue or movie doesn't necessarily explain what you are seeing, nor does it give you voice-overs. Then again, its not too complicated...). And of course, there are scenes of completely amputated prosthetic peni (nawt exactly what ah was lookin fer, but ah had assumed tha gore factor would mostly be in that category). Tha sound-effects are pure troma, but everything else is quite well done.

It builds tha tension nicely, n tries its best ta keep you off-guard while not being outlandish. Tha whole thang has a great digital "Sheen" to it that actually works. In short, the movie tries w.o trying too hard, n succeeds because of that (in my opinion). Thar won't be a bettah movie about dick-eatin-pussies fer quite a while. Probably.

Saturday, May 03, 2008

Hooray Saturday

Last nights Warren Teagarden show was fun - a lawt of fun. Even tho pretty much no one came out, that didn't stop us from jumping around and making asinine comments. Playin w. Nathan's old band was cool too - they were very nice n totally genuine. Tha House of Shields is a hunnered years old n tha stage looks crowded w. about 8 people on it. Tha stage is actually a balcony above tha bar itself, but thars a video feed set up so patrons ken watch from below. Ah talked too loud n sang too hard, which has set my recovering sore throat back at least a day.

Today was beautiful, but windy. We decided to barbeque at christop (of think13)'s house anyway. Veggie kabobs n kickass eggplant w. souvlaki sauce on top n chicken n steak fer tha meateaters. We collectively agreed to drink too much beer and just enjoyed tha day. We've been werkin pretty hard lately and tha new stuff is startin ta sound pretty awesome.

So here's hopin my stupid throat stops jerkin around soon. Ahm gettin my baby (my bike) a tune-up tomorrow, which will be a good excuse ta ride her intae oakland. Have ah mentioned that ah totally love tha West Coast recently?

Thursday, May 01, 2008

New Rawk Videos!

Interestingly enough, even though I haven't played a show in 3 weeks, two videos of me rawkin out w. a band have found thar way to my inbox in tha last 24 hours. Note - both of these videos are significantly less choppy if you go to the youtube page, so links are below.

Tha first is a clip from think13 at Rock It Fest in late March. It's pretty homemade, but if you can get past the shaky camera and so-so sound quality, not too shabby!

youtube (say what you mean live) -

think13 live on youtube

Tha second is from a Warren Teagarden practice in my basement, and is also a bit homemade - this one is from a camera phone. It's one of my favorite Teagarden songs though, and you can *sorta* hear my two bass solos. "Crystal Palace"


Warren Teagarden in my basement

Enjoy!